Sometimes Routine is Overrated

Mama's Bedtime Battles

Every night C and I read the same book at bedtime, at the same time, while we sit in the same position on the bed. We have been doing this for about a year now, and every night our story gets a bit longer. It started with me reading to him, but as his vocabulary expanded, and he was able to retain the words, he began reading to me. It has been amazing to witness and quite the accomplishment. A few years ago he wasn't able to put words into meaningful phrases, and he grew to the point where he began to "read" to me on a nightly basis.

Fast forward to Monday night. We brushed our teeth, walked upstairs, turned the bathroom light on, walked into C's room, grabbed our book, took our places in bed, and began "Story Time". Monday night however was slightly different than our other nights. Suddenly the animals in our book began to have side stories of mostly jargon, some tangible words, and a lot of "and the... (insert animal)". While on a normal day I would have rejoiced, swung from the rafters in glee, Monday night I was not in the mood for extended story time. With each turn of the page, the one line sentence became a longer and still longer string of intangible/ jargon/ animal words.

Bear with me folks, there is a point...

As we sat and turned pages, and repeated words and phrases, and our 1/2 hour story time turned into 45 minutes, I found myself growing antsy. Suddenly out of no where, the phrase "I ain't got time for this" started to make it's way through my larynx and out of my mouth. Thankfully, my mama filter took charge and swallowed that hideous statement, and then I felt the regurgitation, I knew what was about to slip out and I quickly changed my statement to "Let's turn the page and see what happens next".

It was a hideous mommy moment. All I wanted to do was pour a large glass of wine, plop down on the couch and flip the channels back and forth between Bravo and E!.

Finally, we reached the end of the God Forsaken book, and C proudly proclaimed "And they lived happily ever after, The End". As I kissed my sweet boy goodnight, I felt the tension ease, the anxiety release, and I realized that I too, may be in need of a sensory break.

I was reminded by a very dear friend tonight, that we too are human. We too need time to decompress. Sometimes even the simplest of tasks seem insurmountable, and that is okay. As I write, C is watching Yo Gabba Gabba, and is happy. I am not doing one of the million things I have pinned to the board on Pinterest dedicated to C, I am focusing on me, with a glass of wine, and allowing myself to be okay with the break.

Tonight, I will cherish our bedtime routine, I will bask in the longer bedtime story. When I say "Good night, I love you", C will respond "Lub you" and when I say " Have a good night night", he will say "We will". Tonight I will be at peace, and it will only have a little to do with the fact that I was able to enjoy a glass of wine before bedtime tonight.